"Learn to love solitude, to be more alone with yourselves. The tragedy of today’s young people is that they try to unite on the basis of carrying out noisy and aggressive actions so as not to feel lonely, and this is a sad thing. The individual must learn from childhood to be on his own, for this doesn’t mean to be lonely: it means to not get bored with oneself, because a person who finds himself bored when he is alone, it seems to me, is a person in danger."
- Andrei Tarkovsky on being asked, ‘What would you like to tell young people?
"The trend of labeling women “crazy” is part of the culture that socializes women to go along to get along. When women are told over and over again that they’re not allowed to feel the way they feel and that they’re being “unreasonable” or “oversensitive”, they’re conditioned to not trust their own emotions. Their behavior – being assertive, even demanding or standing up for how they feel – becomes an “inconvenience” to men and they’re taught not to give offense and to consider the feelings of others before their own."
- On Labeling Women “Crazy” | Paging Dr. NerdLove - Part 2
"But the aching faded, too. Things get better — hurt less — over time. If you let them."
- Rainbow Rowell, Attachments
"The idea that you’re hard to love is ludicrous."
- Rainbow Rowell, Attachments
"For me, one of the biggest draws of the Internet has always been how I can be alone and yet find connection with other people. I am an introvert. I can fake extroversion, but it is exhausting. I prefer quiet, even when I am happily around other people. I spend an inordinate amount of time in my head. Online, I can be in my head and with interesting people. I can be alone but feel less lonely."
- Roxane Gay, "The Danger of Disclosure"
"I’m not totally mad at you. I’m just sad. You’re all locked up in that little world of yours, and when I try knocking on the door, you just sort of look up for a second and go right back inside."
- Haruki Murakami, Norwegian Wood
thank you so much for replying to my ask about anxiety! it really helped to read how you feel about it. My anxiety sounds very similar to yours. I too work in customer service and I am great at talking to strangers and helping them but the minute anyone in work or outside starts to ask personal questions I start to panic. It has got me into a few awkward situations in the past that I am really not proud of as others would wonder why I was friendly then aloof, if only I could hide it better!
At least we know we’re not alone :) You’ll be ok, I wouldn’t worry too much about the situations you’re just not good in. My mom was a social butterfly and never understood why I was so shy. She thought it was something I just needed more exposure to in order to get more comfortable with it, but I will never be comfortable in these situations. Knowing that now, I allow myself some leway in what I attempt and what I accept as unrealistic for me. I hope you do the same :)
"One must bear in mind the odd angle or slant that the rays of love have to take in order to reach a heart like mine."
- Saul Bellow, Humboldt’s Gift
"I always worried someone would notice me, and then when no one did, I felt lonely."
- Curtis Sittenfeld, Prep